Getting: Twitter is 7 *blows out candles*
Yay! My second fave form of self expression, and the very thing which got me out of my 6 month writers block, Twitter, is 7 today. I joined in 2008, as I was intrigued to know how it worked, and had seen it be widely scorned online and on TV news shows. I remember it being on Click during a BBC Breakfast programme one weekend, and it was seen as a lot of self absorbed geeks writing about what they'd had for tea and other boring, unimportant things from their day to day. It was seen as a bit like belly button fluff- unnecessary, annoying but unquestionably there.
Yes, Twitter can be annoying (like when they got rid of the much better original layout for what we have now which I've never liked as much), yes you get the odd troll or spammer. However, from the New Years Pyjama Parties, to the X Factor Shots and #MummiesForMurs campaigns, not to mention the tweets for #HelpHaiti, #TeamHonk, #BoycottAmazon and #KerryinOurHearts, Twitter has earned its place at the top of the net social tree.
It is still full of self absorbed geeks tweeting about bacon though. Hurrah!
Not Getting: Kids and Illness
Obviously, not the majorly big illness thing. No, we're thankfully doing fine in that area. I'm talking the tummy bug, or House of Vomness that has hit my two children since last Friday without warning.
Friday night saw the start of epic tummy related issues hitting Littlest first, who was fine and dandy and his usual gobbly guts self. Until 10.30pm, when he yakked everywhere. All over himself, all over his bed, and all over his huge rug. Eww. The washing machine was fired up for Mummy Vs Yak, round 1.
He was up most of the night until 3am, then woke up fine and dandy at 8am Saturday. As you do.
We went to the cinema to see The Croods, everyone had a lovely time, had lunch and dinner, and I got the Brats off to bed at a respectable 8.30pm.
At which point, 11pm came round and Mini decided it was her turn to yak in her bed, her hair and all down herself too. She continued in much the same vain, all into Sunday. Again, the washing machine was switched on for Mummy Vs Yak, Rounds 2-9. 8 loads on from Midnight on a rainy Sunday in March. Lovely.
I started to think I should just leave both the Brats in the bath to cut down on washes- as Littlest had decided to join in with the tummy bug "fun" (ahem) but erm, well, he wasn't yakking.
You figure it out.
I begged for peace and an end to the plague, and was rewarded on Monday by Mini feeling all fine and rosy of cheek (by which I mean she was happy to clock her bro for any minor annoyance, as usual).
She went back to school on Tuesday as she was fine and eating well. But by Tuesday lunchtime, she was sick again and sent home. Mummy Vs Yak, the Rematch, began.
Thankfully, today she has stopped, and hasn't been sick since 11pm last night (why the hell do kids always yak most at night? Especially when its Elder's birthday which
I hate kiddie viruses. They suck.
Getting: The Vitriol directed at the Tory Government.
Yeah, loving the choice words directed at George "Couldn't organise a sensible way of getting us out of an insolvent future with a book called "Idiots Guide to avoiding Insolvency" Osbourne. This is again why I love Twitter and online sites like Mashable as it means that instantly, everyone becomes a pundit and says what Levenson has insured the press can't.
They suck, period. How Smugron can possibly ditch a benefit for sick and disabled people which not five minutes ago he used to receive for his own disabled child despite being rich is an irony I find he is that thick he doesn't recognise.
The sooner they are outta there the better.
Not Getting: TV Agony Aunts
Due to the general House of Vomness, I've caught lots of crap daytime TV as Mini needs her hugs. I happened upon some right rubbish, including Louis Spence still being on TV (why? Why? Surely we need to do a Go Compare style ad where Louis is removed from the planet).
I also caught the Letters bit of This Morning. Eugh.
The advice was, well, utter crap to be fair. The problems faced included a couple arguing over night time feeds. The advice was to draw up a rota.
Excuse me while I remove myself from the floor where I find myself after falling about laughing.
That shit don't work my friend. I tried to suggest this to Elder. He got round it by sleeping on his "deaf" side (true fact, he is actually near on entirely deaf in his left ear, which is why when I wish to cuss him, I do so on that side). Of course you are going to have heated debates (or shout at each other in hushed comedy whispers when the Baby finally sleeps). You have a newborn. You are both knackered. There are all kinds of hormones flying about. If there was ever a time when a minor annoyance will become a full blown barney, its after a baby comes along.
Its how you deal with those that's important. I suggest a frying pan round the back of the head. Elder suggested going to a festival when I had a 14 month old Mini and was pregnant with Littlest. Either way, if you manage to break up over something as minor as who takes turns with nigh time feeds, you have some serious relationship questions to ask yourself anyway.
Or there was the friends who had seen their other friend's hubby out with another woman in a bar! Shock and indeed horror.
The general consensus was that he must be only a hop skip and jump away from having actual sex with an actual tart in the actual bar.
Elder has lots of female mates. He has met up with groups of guys and girls at our home and outside it at his Fogey Raves. Does it worry me? No. I'm mates with someone who he had a dalliance with before we ever met. Is it in the back of my mind that, the minute I'm out the room, he is having an orgy with any of these ladies? No.
Its called trust.
Not every guy or girl who is married or in a long term relationship is just looking for any excuse to shag outside it. Men can be mates with women, they may have been there on business. For all these
How about, before you ring your mate (some mate- why wasn't she out with you in this bar?), you ring the hubby and ask him directly? If he is having an affair, you'll hear the guy sweat down the phone line If you're wrong, you'll lose a mate, you'll cause upset for her and her husband, it wont be good.
The advice though was to totally tell her, straight away. Sorry Denise, but I don't agree love. We're not in the 1950s anymore.
I may start me own advice column here.
Getting: My Guilty Secret
I love Hollyoaks. There, I've said it and can't take it back (well, I could, but I can't be arsed).
I especially have love the character, the legend, that was Brendan Brady. So, when it was announced that the Double B was off, I was hoping the writers wouldn't let me down.
My goodness they didn't.
I wont say much as I've seen the "Can't wait so watched it on E4" ep which is shown on Channel 4 tonight. But I defy you to watch and not scream at the end.
I hope they keep it up ('Oaks seems to have up years and then massive down years, I should know as I've watched since ep 1). I hope Emmett ends up doing well from it. He was amazing.
How many other actors can portray a gay, thuggish multiple murderer with a love of Johnny Cash, and still have women fall about for him and root for him? The name of his character trended worldwide on Twitter for 2 hours after the episode aired.
Good bless ye Brendan Brady. Oim Gonna Miss Ye.