Is It Just Me: Thinking the 50,000 Missing Immigrants Could Be Found Easily by the Parking Fine Enforcement Posse?

If you've just woken up, this is the latest round in "inept Immigration teams against sneaky would be immigrants" reported in the papers.

Apparently, if it's not enough there is already a backlog from 2007 onwards of at least 300,000 cases waiting to be dealt with, they have somehow, "lost" or "misplaced" 50,000 others who were turned down and scheduled to leave.

Now, 50 would be careless. 5,000 would be shockingly poor. But 50,000? How the bloody hell do you manage that? And how do we sort that out now? Bar ending up with UKIP no doubt just bumping off anyone who looks a little bit foreign whilst Mike Reid sings his Calypso in the background.

That, obviously, is not the solution. Unless you are Nick Griffin. So what do we do? How do we find these people without costing the taxpayers (you know, us who are actually British and have to pay for these monumental fuck ups?) huge amounts of cash, which no doubt will end with Smugron declaring there was nothing that could be done and they can now stay, like last time?

I think, readers, I have a cheap solution. One which is already in force in this country and filled with the type of rabid ner' do wells who enjoy making people who are in anyway wrong in their eyes life miserable.

I give you, the humble, much maligned, Parking Fine Enforcement teams found in every local council building from here to Scotland and back again.

These types, along with their friends from the TV License Enforcement posse, will leave no stone unturned in their pursuit of your cash, should you stay in a parking spot for two minutes longer than you've paid for. They will send letters, they will take you to court, they would, no doubt, if they could, hang you by your ankles and shake your pockets out of every last penny in the name of government protocol.

They are primed and ready, so why not give them the task of cleaning up where other's have failed?

They will shop their own Grannies if it means doing the will of the Prime Minister.

I say, let them put down their parking fine paperwork, and give them the files of these snide firm, they are bound to find them in at least 2 hours, and then the Immigration process they went through can be completed without fear of them running off again due to the fear of these lot after them with their rules and rubber stamps, as well as driving them insane with rhetoric.

If you can think of a better way, I'd love to hear it, and no doubt, so would the Tories!

All jokes aside, if we can't even trust a department tasked with looking after the countries interests, how can we go about monitoring the kind of undesirables who want to create chaos via terrorism, or keep track of possible sources of Ebola?

50,000 people can't simply disappear, they must be earning a living and paying to live somewhere?

Lets hope the Government does actually fulfill one election promise, before we can't move for people in a country already bursting at the seams.

The Bounty Mutiny- The Say No Campaign Makes National Press

Yes, you read that right readers!

Our (and I say our as there are some fantastic ladies who are fighting against the big boys of Mumsnet and the NCT) campaign has reached the eyes and ears of not just those we disagree with, but Bounty themselves (who are absolutely lovely and shocked at the sudden bad feeling being directed at them), and The Daily Telegraph newspaper too.

It's also great to see that 86 people have now signed the petition, and some of the reasons they give are amazing. Stories which far outweigh the negatives. People who argue that you can say no, no one makes you sign anything.

The thing is, and I've held back on saying this until now, but I studied Government and Politics for A'Level. I found it a bit boring, but I take my hat off to one of my tutors who taught us something which immediately springs to mind regards this campaign.

Have you noticed how the Tory party is on the back foot? Its not likely that they'll get back in at the next election. They made some big promises in the run up to landing joint power with the Lib Dems. 

Promises you don't need me to tell you they have barely kept. The country is still in crisis. There are still British Service people in foreign climes fighting the same wars they classed as "phoney" when arguing with the previous government.

The NHS, that they promised to protect, has gotten worse. As I've said before, Queens has a ridiculous history of child birth related deaths, Stafford, Medway (my own local hospital for many years) and 6 others are being investigated due to their unexplained high death rates. The CQC is being investigated for covering up the deaths of children, and we all saw the shocking footage of patients being abused by staff at Winterbourne View.

I know of bloggers and their families where the treatment they receive is appalling. Some have even had their much needed help revoked. As a family, we have been let down time and time again, and are now simply left to fend for ourselves when it comes to Littlest's illnesses.

So, what does that matter?

A smokescreen.

If you watch old footage of Maggie Thatcher, when times got tough she would bring up the victory in the Falklands. When President Obama had some tough questions from Mitt Romney during his campaign, he mentioned Osama Bin Laden's death.

It's what politicians do. When something gets a bit tough, when they may have to answer to their failures, they bring up things to create a smokescreen, to take attention away.

In the case of the Bounty Mutiny, and the knee jerk Early Day Motion, these Mumsnetters and supporters have played an own goal. 

Both the NHS and the Government are desperate to hide the mistakes, the broken promises. By jumping in with this Mutiny, by agreeing with it and helping it get publicity, they get to skirt the real issue, hide the appalling stats on patient care and move on to something which has been ramped to a major issue, when it clearly boils down to a few women being a bit pissed off they were disturbed.

Has anyone asked Bounty what changes it's willing to make? 

Bounty has admitted, freely, that some times, yes, their representatives do go a bit OTT on the sales angle. However, they have never said that they don't and wont deal with those who do. They are willing to follow whatever the NHS directs. They want to continue to provide a valuable service to the NHS, to new Mums and to the HMRC. 

Who wants to go to their local Jobcentre Plus or Post Office for Child Benefit forms with a new born in a push chair? The Mutineers say they should be left alone to enjoy their baby- can't really do that if having to trundle back and forth to the High Street for forms. Its easier to have them in the packs.

Do we really want to say that, after a baby, we are suddenly too dumbstruck to say no? To suddenly decide to stick with the brands in our packs rather than use the freebies, spend the vouchers and then find a cheaper brand? To not be able to read a form before we fill it out?

This campaign is a joke. The mutineers don't even know what the hell they are fighting for anymore.

First, it was to ban Bounty from hospital wards, their packs, the whole lot. The only time the NHS was mentioned was to badger them via Twitter to remove Bounty. It was all about the negative experiences of a few Mumsnetters.

Next, when a few of us start suggesting that, actually, Bounty is the least of the NHS' problems, suddenly, they did want NHS change as part of a wider part of the Bounty Mutiny. It was about the data protection too. 

Now, it's not a Mumsnet campaign (even though the majority of tweets are from Mumsnetters and Mumsnet HQ), and they first said Bounty should be in a side room for those who want it, the bags on the bed when we book in.

Make your minds up ladies and gents, please!

It's like half of them have read a different brief from the rest!

Unlike our campaign which simply says Bounty give funds which are needed to hospitals. They deserve the chance to make changes to something which has been as much a part of giving birth as booties and stitches where we don't want them. The governments time should not be taken up by a Mumsnet vanity project and an NCT attempt to usurp Bounty in hospitals. Our voices should be used to force change where change is needed, not make a group of people, doing a job which the majority of women appreciate redundant.

The message is clear- we don't go changing it.

Want to help give the government and the NHS trusts something to hide behind? Support the Mutiny.

Want to bring a voice to the silent majority who are sick of the poor treatment when they need it most? Sign the petition.

Thanks for reading.

Double Beds on the Labour Ward? Have the NHS Gone Mad?

This was a headline I saw being discussed on TV this morning, and I had two reactions. Firstly I wanted to check it wasn't April 1st, and secondly I spat my coffee out in shock.

The NHS- you know, them of the lack of funds, epic failings on waiting times, sometimes rude staff and general "only go if you really have no choice" (eg a limb falling off which you can't sew back yourself)- has decided to place double beds on Labour and Maternity wards. They believe this will make Dad's feel more involved right from the start, as they can snuggle up in bed right from the first push.

As a woman, I have to say- hell no! Are you mad?

Is It Time to Disband Big Corporations?

Big Corporations have been getting a well deserved kicking in the press recently. 

Firstly it was the might of Murdoch and his major companies, most notably News Corp, that was under the microscope. Now, it is the, up until now respected company that is the BBC that is also raising eyebrows with it's in house policies on staff behaviour.

We also saw Barclays Bank being admonished, and Bob Diamond stepping down over the Rate Fixing scandal. ( Sadly, those in the know believe Barclays was far from the only Bank taking part in this scam).

So, what have these companies and countless other's like them got in common?